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I decided to take to heart the suggestion that I "seek therapy" probably not in the way the advice was intended; nevertheless, I decided to use the suggestion as an idea for a story. Inspiration can come from almost anywhere, can't it?
While this story is fiction and intended for entertainment purposes only the position of the American Psychiatric Association regarding homosexuality is in fact true. Gay people are considered normal much to the dismay of so many.
Some of you might find offensive the improper relationship between therapist and patient, but how many relationships are among truly equal partners? How many sexual liaisons are prim and proper?
Please don't read this if you are offended by sexual situations between consenting heterosexual adults, homosexual fantasies, or strap-on sex.
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I was ushered from the palatial waiting room to her ostentatious office. I was here reluctantly. I finally decided to seek help, and who better to help me out than a sex therapist?
Extending her hand with a bright smile she said, "A pleasure to meet you. Please have a seat."
"I thought you would ask me to lay down, you know on a couch." I said nervously.
"I won't ask you to lay down ... just yet." She answered cryptically.
I noticed she had her long blonde hair pulled back from her face in a ponytail that drifted down her back. Her black rimmed glasses a contrast to her skins milky whiteness. Her navy blue suit did little to hide her figure.
She noticed my attentiveness and said, "Could you explain to me why you have sought out my services?"
"My current relationship is ... and I .... It has to do with ... I have a hard time .... You see." I was making little sense. I was more nervous than a Mafia accountant.
"Hmmm. You should try and relax. I am not here to judge you I'm here to help you." She said in a reassuring manner.
"It has to do with my fantasies. I can't fess up when my girlfriend asks, and I really want to share but you see ... " I said with a smidgeon more confidence.
"Why can't you share you fantasies with you girlfriend?" She inquired.
"I am worried she will think less of me. Maybe even leave me or .... I don't know." I stammered once again nervous as my confidence wavered.
She stood up and walked to the window. The sun shined through the bamboo blinds tattooing a diagonal pattern across her svelte figure.
She began speaking, "Some people repress their desires because they are ashamed of them. Shame has many variations from simple shyness to embarrassment these emotions seldom cause us any trouble and help us navigate through a world we share with other people."
She looked over at me to see if her statements registered.
I nodded in agreement.
She continued, "When shame causes us to repress strongly held desires this is when we have problems. Assuming for the moment that your desires are not to inflict harm on another or break any laws then you have a legitimate need that should be fulfilled."
I continue to nod in agreement.
She asked, " Are your fantasies in any way illegal or have to do with inflicting harm?"
"No." I responded truthfully.
She smiled and said, "Consider a beautiful girl who has just a simple flaw her nose is slightly too large -- instead of seeing herself realistically in the mirror she magnifies this imperfection until it is out of proportion to the rest of her body, and it begins to take on a disproportionate importance in her life. That is, she becomes her nose. She thinks about it in the day and has dreams of it at night. She then starts to suffer from diminished self-esteem because her desire to be seen as attractive is thwarted by her embarrassment over her nose. The solution isn't a nose job but addressing her self esteem and image issues. This is an example of how shame can work against our best interests. "
"I understand, so my problem is with my shame over my fantasy." I commented.
She continued, "Yes, shame is the hold society has on us compelling us to act in a specified way especially when no one is around. Can you break that hold now -- can you tell me what your desires and fantasies are."
I rallied my courage and said, "My fantasy is to be taken, taken anally. I envision a woman with a strapon and ..."
She picked up my disappearing sentence, "and she takes you anally. She dominates you and you submissively take it right?"
"Yes, then there's more. I sometimes fantasize that it's not her but some guy." I confessed.
She smiled, put down her pen and paper and said, "Many men, straight heterosexual men have gay fantasies that doesn't make them gay. Even a desire for anal play doesn't make a man gay."
"I don't know," I said unconvinced.
She said, "First off, the medical community in general and specifically the psychiatry profession does not view homosexuality as pathology, so there is no need for treatment. We don't treat homosexuals not because they are beyond help but because they don't need it -- do you understand?"
"Yes, but I like girls," I said defensively.
"I'm sure you do. I just wanted to state my position and my professions position about homosexuality. When it comes to sexuality there is a wide spectrum of possibilities between being exclusively heterosexual and exclusively homosexual, and it matters little where your desires place you, unless you aren't being honest with yourself or your partners." She explained.
"I'm worried about what she will think. She may just leave me thinking I'm a queer and laugh at me." I said in a worried tone.
She responded, "No lover can satisfy you completely all the time at exactly the right time, this would be a perfect lover and contrary to storybook romances they don't exist. And chances are your love making will be disappointing if your relationship lacks communication. Couples or partners who have hot kinky sex have excellent communication." She ended her sentence with a captivating smile.
"I guess you right she might be understanding. Who knows she might just buy a strap-on and bugger me right there on the spot." I laughed.
"If she leaves you remember that clichÃ©. There are plenty of fish I the sea." She said.
"Yeah I guess you're right." I answered.
"You could also choose to fulfill you fantasy through alternate means just to see if it is something you want to pursue and incorporate into your sex life." She stated in a professional detached manner.
"Yes, that is a good idea, but how." I asked with a shoulder shrug and palms raised upwards.
"Follow me," She said with a beckoning finger.
I stood and walked across the room. She pushed on the bookcase and to my surprise it swung inward reveling another room.
"Wow, that's pretty cool something like you'd see in a James Bond movie." I said fascinated.
"The room is sound proofed too." She said stepping inside.
"I could sure use one of these rooms, my neighbors are a pain in the ass they as so noisy I sometimes think they train elephants for the circus." I said stepping over the threshold.
I asked, "Where are you taking me?" even though I didn't care I would have followed her anywhere.
"A place where fantasy become reality." She replied seductively.
She touched a single finger to a panel set in the wall and instantly the room was illuminated, and I was amazed at what this room contained.
She waked into the room with me close behind, following the undulating firmness of her buttocks barely concealed under her navy blue pleated skirt.
"If you were to pick the right size for yourself, which one would you choose." Her hand passed over a collection of dildos of varying sizes, shapes, and colors.
I could feel the feint stirrings of an erection as I looked over that table. I made my selection, and she looked at me with raised eyebrows asking, "Are you sure you can handle it?"
I nodded knowing I could.
She picked up the dildo feeling the weight in her hand, and pointed to the room divider saying, "why don't you get undressed behind there and then we start."
"Start?" I asked, dumbfounded at the possibilities that up till now I could only imagine. In a flash, erotic images raced through my mind, the rush of adrenaline began to course through my veins, and my breathing became deeper all in anticipation of things to come.
"I'm going to use this (she held up the dildo) on you, unless you don't want me to." She said just loud enough for me to hear. She finished her sentence by pulling out her scrunchy setting her hair free from bondage; it exploded in blond curly locks that cascaded down her shoulders. She shook her head lightly from side to side allowing her long blond hair to separate into its natural part.
"Ok." I said mesmerized by the sheer radiance of her beauty. I didn't move I was transfixed to that spot immobilized like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle.
She licked her upper lip gently and ever so slowly. The light seemed to dance across her shiny lips. Unconsciously, I licked my lips in sympathetic imitation.
She tapped my chest with that obscene instrument and said more forcefully, "Go over there and get undressed -- NOW."
I walked over to the room divider and disrobed quicker than I could have though possible. I stood there naked wondering if she would be disappointed. I peeked around the corner for permission to return.
"Come here my little pet," her hand made a come hither gesture. She began to slowly disrobe. She started with her navy blue jacket it dropped over one shoulder exposing her bare flesh then she turned her back. She looked over her shoulder and let the jacket fall to the floor.
Her bra snapped off in front but I couldn't see her breasts.
She slowly wiggled out of her navy blue pleated skirt, once it got past her ass she let it slid down her legs all the way to the floor and stepped away.
Standing with her back to me, clad only in sheer black panties that showed the sublime division of her ass cheeks, reminding me of a ripe peach in summertime, she reached for the tool that would show me what it's like to be a woman.
She stepped into the straps that would hold it in place, securing it with buckles at her hips.
She slowly turned and I responded with an involuntary gasp. Her womanly figure was contrasted by the life like cock dangling between her legs. I had never seen anything like that before, in real life that is.
Her breasts were firm, exquisite, and worthy of any mans lust.
Our eyes locked, she moved toward me slowly like she was stalking some helpless prey, each step she took caused her pendulous appendage to swing indecently from side to side.
I was so hot I was smoldering, oblivious to anything and everything but her, and that lewd thing between her legs.
I was yielding to her without any care at all. I followed her orders without comment or complaint resigning myself to her ministrations.
I found myself in the humbling position of being on all fours. My ass was exposed as a carnal welcome to her forceful advances. I never knew my lecherous thoughts would ever come to fruition.
She lubricated me with expert hands probing my vulnerability, tightness and receptivity. She heard my encouraging moans and promised me more, much more. I was instructed to stop any self-arousal and surrender myself completely to her.
The time came when she mounted me from behind her small hands gripping my waist tightly.
I felt the searching hardness.
Sliding up and down the divide of my ass teasing me taunting me.
I arched my back and pushed backward in frustration.
I just couldn't take it anymore. The taunting and teasing that sent chills across my body in wave after wave.
"Please." I pleaded.
"Please what? Say it. Tell me what you want'" She asked.
"Fuck me. Fuck my ass." I said with abandon.
I had to endure even more teasing until suddenly she gripped my hair tightly and placed the head strategically asking, "Are you ready?"
"Yessss." I hissed with unrestrained lust.
The head slipped passed my resistance and sent a sharp pain shooting through my body. "Oooh god." I exclaimed.
She stopped all movement and asked, "Are you OK?"
"Yes, just give me a minute." I said between labored breaths.
Her hands ran all over my ass and body in light strokes that banished every feeling of reluctance my body retained and left only servitude.
She picked up on my readiness and began to slowly feed me inch after inch taking possession of me.
I was reduced to a moaning slut eager to be filled.
She slowly gave me more all the while asking, "is it too much or not enough? Talk to me baby."
"More," was my only reply betraying my lecherous need.
"You took it all." She announced with her hips bumping up against my ass.
She pulled my ass cheeks apart sliding just a smidgeon more up inside. "There now that's all I've got to give." She said.
She withdrew slowly, abandoning me, leaving behind a void. I groaned in protest.
It felt like she was turning me inside out.
"You've got quite a grip on me. You don't want to let go do you?" She asked mockingly.
When she was almost completely free she changed direction and pushed forward. I moaned again, this time she answered me with the palm of her hand.
Smack! The sound reverberated in my ears.
"Ouch!" I exclaimed.
"You slut you like it don't you?" She asked me to debase myself.
"yes, yes I do." I said in a dreamy stupor.
Her thrusting went from sweet and soft to hard and fast over a period of time that seemed like eternity.
This beautiful woman used me as her fuck toy, penetrating me violating me, and I loved it, needed it.
She pulled my hair, bit my shoulder and neck as she drove her cock deep into me. She would talk to me like a common whore asking, "Do you like it slut? Do you?"
Her foulmouthed attacks on my dignity increased in intensity to match her forceful thrusting, "Do you like it up the ass you little whore? Just imagine I'm a real man back here fucking your ass would you like that?"
I always answered her with yes and more.
My body began to spasm with an orgasm of such intensity that I almost blacked out. She continued to piston in and out causing me more feelings of pleasure that spread outward from ass all over my entire body until I couldn't take it anymore and pleaded for her to stop.
She withdrew from my ass leaving me gaping with indignity and satisfaction. I stood up on shaky legs.
She eyed me with a look of accomplishment and said, "That was quite pleasing. I enjoyed that. I think I'll reduce your bill accordingly."
My whole body trembled.
All I was capable of was a feeble, "thank you."
~ The End (?) ~